February 2011
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Vibrated
Mom: Your phone just vibrated.
Mom: It just did it again.
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Terry Border Makes Everyday Objects Come Alive (18... →
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Superhero Privacy Rights, Part Two | Law and the... →
WHEN PARENTS TEXT™ • Spreading the Word →
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Amber Alert
Mom: Just got an Amber Alert text. Be on the lookout for a 1998 Red Ford Taurus, license place DXM 284.
Me: Why do you get those things?
Mom: So I can help fight crime! I’m one of the good guys!
The two most common elements in the universe are Hydrogen and stupidity.
– Harlan Ellison (via criminalwisdom)
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Constants
Mom: I dislike chicken nuggets. That is the one constant in my life.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time...
– Jim Henson (via kari-shma)
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RELAX
Dad: We’re bringing home Cheryl burritos
Me: do you mean Cheryl and burritos or Cheryl’s burritos?
Dad: it was just a TEXT, relax.
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thedailywhat:
Unfortunate Incident of the Day: A tragedy of biblical proportions struck the town of Beebe, Arkansas, as 1,000 birds fell lifeless from the sky on New Year’s Eve.
The state’s Livestock and Poultry Commission offered hail or lightning as possible explanations for the bizarre event, but also added that it may well be that fireworks startled the flock to death.
[mediaite.]
Found Phone
MOM: I hope you find your phone.
MOM: Oh that was stupid; You won’t get that text or this text until you find your phone. This text was stupid too. Ignore the past two message I sent.
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How to Play Ghost in the Graveyard: 8 steps -... →
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What's under Kakashi's mask? - Cosplay.com →
The Store
MOM: I would like u to go to the store.
ME: what store?
MOM: ur going to the store.
ME: …what store?
MOM: I need something to cook for tonight.
ME: WHAT STORE?
MOM: dollar store.
I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of...
– Marilyn Monroe (via kari-shma)
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Welcome to my newest follower (and followee):...
saraoligny.tumblr.com
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CASE OF THE EXPLODING PIZZA MAN →
criminalwisdom:
The Incredible True Story of the Collar Bomb Heist
“Addressed to the “Bomb Hostage,” the notes instructed Wells to rob the bank of $250,000, then follow a set of complex instructions to find various keys and combination codes hidden throughout Erie. It contained drawings, threats, and detailed maps. If Wells did as he was told, the instructions promised, he’d wind up with the...
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Lag
Mom: We are having lag at maryanns and scotts
Me: Lag?
Mom: Lasagna
Me: You can’t abbreviate lasagna
Mom: ok
Queensland Weather and Warnings →
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asparagus quiche | frugalandthriving.com.au →